So you’ve come to this site, perhaps to get some support with an issue your child may be experiencing. You may have heard about meditation, even tried it a few times…did you let out an exasperated sigh and think, “I’ll leave it up to the Buddhists monks!”
Meditation is not meant to be hard, in fact it really is very simple. It isn’t a mysterious Eastern practice, but rather an art that has been practiced over centuries, throughout many cultures, resulting in many healing benefits.
If you sit comfortably for a few minutes and focus on your breathing, then you are starting to meditate! Just notice how you breathe. Is it shallow, into your chest? Or longer and slower into your abdomen? See if you can start to slow down, but only at a rhythm that is comfortable for you. Deepen your breath and start to allow your body to relax. If you sit for a little longer, perhaps with some nice instrumental music playing softly, and simply notice your thoughts, then you are starting to meditate. If you practice this “thought awareness” without any judgement of the thought, or playing out any drama with the thought, then you are meditating… it really isn’t rocket science!
If I had a dollar for every time someone said to me they can’t meditate…hehe!! I can relate though, even now after nearly 20 years of practice, I still have those days where every thought known to man seems to enter my mind and cause chaos…or I can hear my child getting out of bed for one last toilet trip, or one last kiss from daddy, and the sounds they make seem magnified, like everyone is intentionally stomping and yelling! My point is, it is about being gentle with yourself, and understanding that we are only human, so some days you may meditate like the Dalai Lama and other days like a toddler at 5pm!
When we learn something new, it can take time to settle into the new routine. So I suggest starting out with 5 to 10 minutes a day, and let’s face it, if you are a parent with little children, you probably can’t find any more time than that!
If you are wanting to learn more for yourself about different techniques, then I can highly recommend grabbing a copy of Ian Gawler’s Peace of Mind. It’s a terrific explanation of various techniques you can use other than sitting still, trying to stop your thoughts!!!! Eeeek!!
If you want more practical tips then visit my friend and mentor, Lisa Forde’s site, for a short course designed to support you in finding some meditation techniques to help with stress and wellbeing: Online Workshop Also, if you are a parent of a child on the ASD spectrum then I can also recommend Lisa’s site http://lisaforde.com/ for Blog’s and other resources to support you.
When you become a parent it is like a whole part of you is switched on, and never turns off!! When your children are little, you are aware constantly of what they are doing. Practicing meditation doesn’t stop that awareness, in fact it is the opposite, your awareness becomes heightened. It can become as though you are looking on from a place of impartiality, a place of peace, a place where you can rest in the understanding that, right now, in this moment, everything is just as it should be. When meditating, you may still be aware of the sounds your child is making, but over time, with practice, those sounds become in the background and less of a distraction.
By starting your own regular meditation practice you are creating such a great example for your family. You are honouring your need for time out! You deserve it! Being a parent can be tough! By spending 5 minutes a day, just for you, to simply breathe and relax, you are creating a huge ripple effect that can bring beautiful rewards. Perhaps it will start out by being a noticeably clearer mind, or a little more energy after another night of broken sleep! Maybe it will be that the constant wailing doesn’t seem to bother you so much! Whatever benefit it brings can only be good for you and your family.
(Check out this preview of a meditation you might like to try with your child, available for purchase on the Shop page)
So take care of yourself, you are precious!